Setting Goals When You’re Inattentive

by barbaraluther on July 7, 2013

One of the striking things I find about inattentive clients (and myself) is that they don’t think to identify goals with specificity.  I may think that I want something to happen, but it doesn’t occur to me to decide when I want it, how badly I want it, and what I can do to assure that it will happen.

Some of this is due to our living in our heads and not feeling our future selves so that we want to provide for him or her.  It’s also hard to keep a long-term goal in mind, and it’s not easy to get into action on many things, let alone a long-term goal that feels impossibly far away.

Perhaps we need a regular prompt or series of questions in our personal operations manual to help us pin down our goals so that we can actually achieve them.

What do you expect to have 10 years from now (or choose an amount of time)?

How badly do you want to have that?

What are you willing to do right now toward your goal?

When specifically do you expect to reach the goal?

What steps need to occur along the way?

What system or plan do you have in place to be sure you’ll reach that goal by the time you want?

What could get in the way of reaching your goal?

How will you get around any obstacle that appears?

How can you keep this future goal in mind?

What can you tell yourself that supports you to reach your goal?

The key is to pause in the first place to ask ourselves what we want, then we can follow a process or these questions to help us truly have a chance of reaching our goals.  Give yourself a prompt to go deeper when you think about what you want; otherwise, it’s only ever going to be a fantasy.

Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post: